Hey I Do Stuff

And sometimes it's cool

5 notes

Bit of a sudden leap in progression at the end there, but I got sucked in at the final strait and emerged three hours later with my hand killing me.

3 notes

I’m far too fond of this hat. But it’s my indoors hat, and occasional “I don’t know anyone here and it’s cold” hat. Look at my massive face.

I’m far too fond of this hat. But it’s my indoors hat, and occasional “I don’t know anyone here and it’s cold” hat. Look at my massive face.

3 notes

Me and woman at makeup counter

Me:
Hi, I'm looking for a foundation.
Makeup lady:
Sure, do you want to test this one out? It's OK to remove your makeup, right? *grabs cotton ball*
Me:
OK, just a patch tes-AAAARRRGGHH OH GOD YOU'VE REMOVED MY FACE YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'VE DONE AAAAAA.
*bystanders go insane in horror, small children stab eyebrow pencils into their eyes, the screaming, the screaming*
Makeup lady:
OK, there's the foundation on you. That good?
What I actually say:
Why yes that's lovely, thank you.

8,301 notes

Tried similar to this the other day with my new threaded brows (MAD THREADS, BRO). Looked like a fucking lunatic. Lesson: some faces look ridiculous if you poke them around too much. Also lesson: sometimes threading women get too enthusiastic about the state of your scraggly brows and MAKE YOU BLEED.

Tried similar to this the other day with my new threaded brows (MAD THREADS, BRO). Looked like a fucking lunatic.

Lesson: some faces look ridiculous if you poke them around too much.

Also lesson: sometimes threading women get too enthusiastic about the state of your scraggly brows and MAKE YOU BLEED.

(Source: makeuploversunite, via destroyed)

3 notes

Just putting the final touches onto a picture of a foetus with Donald Trump’s hair:

Joe: “I missed you doing Cracked stuff.”

After a three month hiatus spent acclimatising to a new job where I can’t wear pajamas to work, I am back at Cracked and sorting out the archive. Thanks to the lovely and understanding people who let me run around back there. Check out the early 2005 stuff, where you can see such timely articles such as Karl Rove musing about Ann Coulter, TomKat’s baby announcement, and K-Fed! (Also some really funny and timeless things too. Believe me, things were weird back then).